10 Coaching Questions for Enneagram 8's
Why so serious?
According to the Enneagram Institute, Eights are self-confident, strong, and assertive. Protective, resourceful, straight-talking, and decisive, but can also be ego-centric and domineering. Eights feel they must control their environment, especially people, sometimes becoming confrontational and intimidating. Eights typically have problems with their tempers and with allowing themselves to be vulnerable. At their Best: self-mastering, they use their strength to improve others’ lives, becoming heroic, magnanimous, and inspiring.
We have named personality type Eight The Challenger because, of all the types, Eights enjoy taking on challenges themselves as well as giving others opportunities that challenge them to exceed themselves in some way. Eights are charismatic and have the physical and psychological capacities to persuade others to follow them into all kinds of endeavors—from starting a company, to rebuilding a city, to running a household, to waging war, to making peace.
(*Definitions are from The Enneagram Institute. You can take a free enneagram test here if you are interested.)
Eights are powerful! They advocate for a cause. They are incredible warriors for good - be that justice, relational connection, care for the underprivileged or needy, or any cause that needs to be championed.
8's as coaches can be empowering. They are especially apt to breathe life into the downtrodden. They help people see their value and to learn how to advocate for what they need.
8's being coached may need assistance being vulnerable as they can seem to "do no wrong" when their motives are so honorable.
Here are 10 questions for 8's:
1) Who are you called to champion? 8's are drawn to certain marginalized people groups anywhere from underprivileged youth to women in leadership. Discerning where to focus your strength can hone in your energy focus.
2) What really needs to be done? Having passion for a cause and feeling strong about it are only the first steps. Discerning how to channel that energy beneficially is what actually moves the needle. Beware the pull to getting wound up and then focusing your energy on getting others wound up rather than effecting change.
3) Who is in your inner circle? If 8's have a nemesis it is feeling the need to be an invincible "superhero". It can be hard to allow yourself to be human. Inviting trusted friends to ask personal questions and check in on how you are really doing brings a needed human connection and offers a needed depth to your spiritual health.
4) How are you coming across? 8's are powerful and once a goal is chosen it can be easy to come across as proud or inflexible. Checking in with others can make be tell-tale as to the effectiveness of the energy expended. (This may be the most difficult practice to lean in to.)
5) Who could you partner with? Maybe you simply need someone who can help you think things through or maybe you need to join with an organization that is already moving in the same direction.
6) How is your own soul? 8's can work themselves into a tizzy and neglect their physical, emotional or spiritual health for the sake of their cause. Learning to incorporate rhythms of rest and self-care are not only valuable personally but will ensure bringing your best self to the journey.
7) Are there others who are being affected? At times 8's only count the cost personally, but sometimes there can be collateral damage for the sake of the cause. Is your family paying a price? Are the people who work with you over-investing as well?
8) How can you bring your best self? Before entering a meeting or even a conversation what practices could ground you so you don't come in "too hot"? 8's are often skilled at reading people - how can you consider what the others in the meeting may be feeling or what the other person you are going to be talking to may be thinking?
9) What is the hoped outcome? 8's change things! They see a future that could be, they envision a better now. Clarifying a way to verbalize the goal helps bring it about!
10) Who is on your team? Caring for others and being an advocate is a big part of an 8's life, but you are people too! Who is championing you? Who believes in who you are not just what you are doing?
8's who are coaches who can empower people. They often see truth more clearly than most and can help others identify limiting beliefs. They are champions at helping others get unstuck.
8's being coached may need questions that help them regulate their pace and their powerful presence.
To learn more about your personal divine design check out our course Destiny by Design. For more on Coach Training and other Bridges Coaching offerings check out our Bridges Coaching home page.