Retirees, Empty-Nesters And People In Career Transition Have This In Common
Bet you've never asked that question before!
Retirees often look for a "third calling"*. So often you hear people in that age group wondering how best to use their time. (I know because some of my firends and my mom are there and I am almost there!)Ā
Empty-nesters ask a similar question, "What now?"
People in career transitions usually know what their next role will be, but what all three groups have in common is OPPORTUNITY to level up their impact.
I'm just back from a Super Multiplier's Workshop that Mac Lake offered in Charleston. I loved his thoughts on investing in the next generation. He's a leading authority on discipleship and forwards a process called the Leadership Pipeline. He did a demo where he was working with two people he was investing in. One of them asked him a question, and Mac asked him back what he thought about it. The first guy talked it out a bit and came to a conclusion he felt good about. I wish I could remember what the focus was, but the part that stood...
How Freeze-Framing Stalls Forward Movement
"Freeze-framing" as a coaching concept may be a term that my husband and I made up. I really can't remember (and I even tried googling it), but no matter the origin, the gist of it is quite helpful.Ā
In a movie or video, freeze-framing is when the projection stops on one particular moment, and the show does not move forward. You only see one frame in still life.Ā
Our thoughts toward situations can be like that. We can freeze the forward movement, so to speak, and not be able to see what could happen if there were movement.Ā
We freeze-frame others when we think of them as not being able to change or grow. We use words like always or never in our thoughts about them. It sounds like, "Well, she'll never change. She never speaks up.", or "He just has a quick temper, you can't really trust him." You get the picture?
We can freeze-frame situations or organizations in the same way. "It's just like that. There's nothing we can do." Entire communities, countries, or cultures can be locked i...
How to Go Deeper with Advanced Coaching Concepts
Ā
There are multiple types of "Aha" moments available in coaching. Let's look at a few together:
- Choosing a specific focus when there were many worthy options to consider.
- Making a quality SMART goal.Ā
- Recognizing a mindset that has been holding you back.
- Developing a plan to "maintain your gain" and keep up with the new habit or whatever you worked toward.
Like we talked about last time, having a coaching mindset starts with Active Listening and Asking Empowering questions. At its core, coaching culture chooses to put the other person first and prioritize what they are sharing.Ā
We can do this as friends. We honor our family when we focus on whatever is important to them in a conversation.Ā
Regular conversations are different. They can be two friends doing life together by sharing experiences and insights. They can be family chats sharing the highs and lows of life, or resolving scheduling issues. They can even be problem-solving in a group setting.
Most of the above deal...
Two Natural Responses that are NOT Coachy
Coaching is defined as a set of conversational tools (and even conversational rules - or best practices) that can be used to aid someone as they discern their next steps.
In faith-based coaching, that means believing the Holy Spirit IS guiding the other person, and our job is to create a safe space for them to focus on one area and talk it out.Ā
In our initial training, Life Coach Certification, we build on the foundational pillars of Active Listening and Asking Powerful Questions. That's one of the reasons our tagline at Bridges is: making disciples, not dependents. We don't want to tell people what to do; rather, we want to help them feel confident about pursuing the next step in their personal faith journey.
We encourage these trainees to practice their coaching skills by doing 3 things.Ā
1- Guiding their coachee to choose a singular focus.
2- Talking less than 20% of the time in a coaching session.
3- Completing the session with an agreed-upon action step - even if that step ...
Best Bang for the Buck! [Time-Sensitive]
Do you ever wish your conversations could have more impact or resolution?
Do you want to help people grow in their connection with God and others?
Do you hope to leave a legacy of investment in those around you?
Coach Training could be your answer! (Not sure: check out "Why take coach training?(isn't it just for professionals?")) Or maybe you do want to be a professional or work for Bridges Coaching - our training offers a pathway for you as well.Ā
If you have been considering coach training, this may be your best time to commit!Ā
If you have already been coach-trained, is there someone you know who would benefit from these options if you forwarded them?
Check out these time-sensitive options:
For the first time ever, we are offering an early registration discount valid through April. Click here for specifics and to register!
Or maybe you'd prefer what we call "Coaching Lite", use this link for $50 off the Video Course access with workbook from Amazon. (3-month access)
If you ...
Coaching Thoughts from JOSHUA at Sight & Sound
I got the privilege of going to the premiere of this year's Lancaster Sight & Sound show, Joshua! What a treat! I was asked to share my takeaways with a staff member there, so I decided to share them here for you as well.
Here's the email I sent, plus a little extra.Ā
- I was personally challenged and encouraged that waiting can equal faithfulness. Moses had to wait before he was called to be the deliverer. The Israelites had to wait in the desert for 40 years before entering the promised land, and then another 40 years after theĀ ten spies came back with a bad report. I am such an action-oriented person that waiting feels like a punishment, an act of passivity, fear, or disobedience. However, if waiting is what is being asked of us, then it is the exact right thing to do.
- I/we can wait in grumbling or gratefulness. Itās all about perspective. How many times have we judged the Israelites for grumbling when we do the same thing? We grumble just like they did when we say, āWell at lea...
Employment Opportunities with Bridges Coaching
Recently, I received an inquiry from a Coach Training alumnus who is curious about working at Bridges.Ā
Here's a version of my reply:
I do remember you š, and Iām honored you are using your coach training and reaching out.Ā
There are basically two options available for Bridges alumni who have completed both trainings (Coaching Culture and Next Level Training )Ā
The first option is to be listed on the Associate Coaches page.Ā This is a space to āhang your shingleā and begin coaching professionally. We donāt provide clients, or scheduling, or handle payment; the page listing is simply a space that shows you are aligned with something bigger than yourself for a small annual fee. The upside is that coaching is a fairly unregulated business, so it is fairly simple to launch, but you would still need to get an LLC and set up a legal business. The downside is that while IĀ encourage my blog readers to be coached and check out our Associate coaches, the responsibility for recruiting clie...
Coaching For Everyday Conversations
If you know coaching,Ā you probably know at least some of the basic tenets. In our Coaching culture training, we dig into the pillars of Active Listening and Asking Powerful Questions. This alone is most often an intense culture shift. It's much more common to offer a solution based on our own education or experience than to be present for someone and offer a space for them to talk through their situation.Ā
And yet we all love to be heard.Ā
And most of us prefer not to be told what to do. (Check out the blog on the "instawall".)
In our Life Coach Certification, we give trainees three goals for their first coaching sessions:
1. Ask the person being coached to come with a focus.
2. Ensure the person being coached does most of the talking (80% goal)
3. Complete the coaching with an action step of some sort - even if it is to come back to the next session with a list of possibilities
All these are valuable practices, but not very common.Ā
*Try it! If you are not yet coach-trained, ...
Getting "It" Out
Honestly, I often don't know what IS in there. Iām not sure how God is guiding me. That's the problem.
I don't just coach others. I get coached as well, and lean into the process. !Ā
I'm naturally an introvert, meaning I usually don't need to talk out loud to process what I am thinking or feeling. Healthy awareness always takes intentionality, though, and I have found over the years that when I talk things out, I need to choose words to share what I am pondering. This helps me frame out what is really happening.
The Biblical premise is that God has put HIs Spirit within each of us, and there is an inner compass guiding us more than we usually recognize.
John 10:3b says, "...the sheep listen to the voice of the shepherd. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out."
People learn to discern between voices when they listen to one over and over. We learn to discern God's voice by listening.Ā
Good coaching helps us hear what He is already saying to us!
Romans 8:14-15 say...
POV: 2 Kinds of Coaching
So there I was at a conference this last weekend, and the facilitator was talking about how he coaches couples. I always want to stop and ask, "What do you mean when you say, 'coaching'?"
The verb "coaching" has its roots in an actual coach, like the one Cinderella took to the ball. Coaches, the noun, take people from one place to another, from a certain here to an intended there.
Now, no one owns the word 'coach,' and it has at least two common meanings. The first is the one most people think of first - a sports coach. They work with children all the way to the pros. They commonly focus on one sport, though my son-in-law, Skyler, seems to coach whatever is needed if it affects one of his kids. He definitely prefers and is best at football, though. Not only does he love football, but he knows a thing or two in that field. He played football and understands what it takes to build a team, etc. (One time he coached his daughter's soccer team because there literally was no one else there...