Is Coaching Even Biblical? [More]
Firsts are important. First impressions set the tone for how relationships are going to role. First interactions set a foundation for protocol.
Let's take a quick look at God's first corrective teaching interaction with man. When Adam and Ever first messed up in the garden and ate the forbidden fruit, God could have given them a lecture about listening. He could have sat them down and taught them about follow-through.
Instead, God offered them an "Aha" moment. An "Aha" moment is an example of adult learning - where people come to an understanding of something on their own rather than being told by someone else. I believe God asked Adam a question to help him come to a personal realization. God asked, "Where are you?" Adam answered that he was hiding because he was afraid.
God didn't ask because he didn't know where Adam was or what he had done. He asked for Adam's sake.
Adam could then move forward and deal with where he was at.
When Job went through all the stuff God waited while he processed his pain and hurt and dealt with his unhelpful friends and then God offered Job an "Aha" moment as well with possibly the longest list of questions in the whole Bible. He starts off with, "Be strong like a man! I will ask you questions, and you must answer me" and then goes on for several full chapters. It's one of the best treatises on the sovereignty of God in the whole Bible.
My heart really goes out to Job. What happened to him does not seem fair to me at all. But who am I to question God? And that is the exact "Aha" moment that Job had. He said, "My ears had heard of you before, but now my eyes have seen you." He came to a clear understanding that God was way bigger than he was and didn't owe him anything. In fact, anything we get from God is only because of His goodness.
Job said what he saw and God honored him for it and favored him even more than before the misadventure.
God wants us to verbalize where we are at and what we need. In Matthew 6:8, Jesus tells us that the Father already knows what we need, but then He goes on to teach us how to pray. Seeing and then saying what we see and want it important to God.
Jesus often asked people who needed healing what they wanted when He already knew. He wanted them to say it.
To be honest, it takes more work to coach than to tell.
And coaching is not always the best approach.
In our training, we talk about the progression of Telling > Teaching > Training > Trusting.
There is certainly a place for them all. Jesus did them all.
How will you decide if the coaching approach is what is needed in your conversations and interactions?
What holds you back from asking insightful and empowering questions that could lead to adult learning "Aha" moments?
Last time we talked about places where coaching could be used in a person's life regarding upcoming decisions. Going deeper, coaching can be used to help people see what is motivating their indecision, or angst, their passivity or aggression, their fears or their foolishness.
Good coaching reveals blind spots.
Good coaching assists in healthy forward movement.
Coaching is just a contemporary term for disciple-making.