Asking Is Better Than Telling: 10 Ways Coaching Can Help You
Coaching is a straightforward and powerful tool for unlocking people's desires and dreams.
But it's not for everyone.
Some leaders are used to telling people what to do. In fact, some even enjoy the power and authority they have.
Coaching isn't for these people.
But if you want to...
- empower and enable those you lead to go farther faster
- multiply your impact by raising up mature believers who can hear and respond to what God is speaking
- free your schedule by not holding repetitive meetings with people who are dependent on you
Then coaching is most definitely for you!
Here are 10 ways coaching can help.
10. You don’t have to know everything for everyone.
Leaders who tell have to know what’s best for every situation and each person in order to be effective. That’s a lot of stuff to know! (And what if you aren’t right?)
9. People love it when you focus on them.
Active listening is the highest form of loving someone. When the focus is on the other person there is a lot less pressure on the coach to solve issues. It is way easier to be curious, trust the Holy Spirit, and listen than to have to diagnose and prescribe.
8. Relationship trumps regimen every time.
God designed us to be in relationship with Him and others. When we reduce leadership to telling people what to do, we can easily “cookie-cutter” people by categorizing them and offering a rules pathway to results rather than connecting relationally to walk through life with them.
7. Anyone can do it.
Tools needed for coaching are a deep trust that the Holy Spirit is at work in every person and curiosity to move toward alignment with His plan.
6. Coaching creates disciples (not dependents).
If you want people to need you then you should always tell them what to do. If you want to make disciples you should walk with them as they learn to discern God’s voice and practice their faith.
5. It’s fun.
You never know what God may have planted in people’s hearts and being a part of what God is doing on the earth through people is endlessly exciting.
4. Powerful questions create dynamic conversation.
Spirit-led coaching questions result in exciting next step possibilities, life-changing release or healing, and deep authentic connections.
3. The possibilities are endless.
Who knows where the wind may blow or how the Spirit may lead?
Ecclesiastes 11:5: "You don’t know where the wind will blow, and you don’t know how a baby grows inside the mother. In the same way, you don’t know what God is doing, or how he created everything."
1 Corinthians 2:11: "Who knows the thoughts that another person has? Only a person’s spirit that lives within him knows his thoughts. It is the same with God. No one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God."
2. It’s honoring.
When a coach defers to letting the other person lead the conversation, they feel a sense of respect and worthiness. After all, it is their life. Shouldn’t it be there choice?
Galatians 6:5: "Each person must be responsible for himself."
Jesus came to serve, not to be served. When we are secure in our identity in Christ, we seek to give honor not expect to receive it.
1. It’s Biblical
When the curtain in the temple was torn in two from top to bottom scripture says it signifies access to the Holy of Holies where people can converse with God on their own and not through a mediator.
In the New Testament, active followers are all called “a priesthood of believers”, there is no longer a hierarchy. God wants relationship with each of us personally.
The New Agreement prophesied in the OT and referred to in the NT offers that each of us will “no longer have to teach their neighbors and relatives to know the Lord, because all people will know me, from the least to the most important.” Hebrews 8:11
What’s holding you back from coach training?
Whether you’re in a leadership role in your ministry environment or a believer who simply wants to make a difference in the Kingdom, we all started out wanting to help people grow, right?
MORE: If you missed “So, What EXACTLY is Coaching?” Or “7 Ways Coaching Promotes God's Plan For Spiritual Growth” you can check them out here.